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About Me |
Pretentious fuckers, I hate you all.I am the Black Madonna, your Magdalena....I am a Rose, I am a beautiful thing... if handled incorrectly, I will make you bleed."No belief is neutral.
Everyone has the power to dictate
each decision you make.
For a decision is a conclusion
based on everything that you believe."
~ Course in Miracles*****"You'll come crashing 'round, bleeding me here, holding me down. I think I like it."size>A friend once told me: "You're a freak and you accept it. That's nice." *****
Me. Here goes.
I'm a loving person. I really am. I love my family, and I love my friends.
I don't do bullshit. I'm annoyed very easily. I also have infinite amounts of patience, so you never know when I've had enough and am two seconds from blowing your shit up.
I am a caring person. I don't want to see anyone hurt, and I try very hard to not hurt anyone around me. Not necessarily because I give a damn about them, but because I know how I would feel, if I were in such a situation... and I just don't think that another human should have to go through that. Unless, of course, if said human has pissed me off. The only choice then is total annihilation.
"My ends justify my means..."
I'm recently married to the man that I found when I wasn't looking - and I am incredibly happy and content. My family is my No. 1 priority, which is why I do not spend as much time online as I used to. I guess you could say I don't need it as much anymore. But still - I'm not the nicest person I could be to new people. I don't know why, but my attitude refuses to shift, despite my happy situation. So if I'm unaccountably rude towards you, it's not you, it's me. Or maybe it is you, and I just don't want to be fucking patient or considerate about things that should be painfully apparent.
I'm Pagan. I'm an occultist.
Paganism: (from Latin paganus) and Heathenry are catch-all terms which have come to connote a broad set of spiritual/religious beliefs and practices of a natural religion, as opposed to the Abrahamic religions. These beliefs, which are not necessarily compatible with each other, are usually characterized by polytheism and animism.
Occult: from Latin occultus (hidden), referring to the 'knowledge of the secret' or 'knowledge of the hidden' and often meaning 'knowledge of the supernatural', as opposed to 'knowledge of the visible' or 'knowledge of the measurable', usually referred to as science.
Occultist: a believer in occultism; someone versed in the occult arts
I am also quite religious: Having or showing belief in and reverence for God or a deity.
My beliefs are my own.
I am not here to argue your point of view, or to validate it. I here to live my life... and to ride the spiral to the end.
"All doctrines are but so many paths..." Ramakrishna
I smile a lot. I curse a whole lot more.
You can always find peppermint and black English breakfast tea in my cupboard.
I read a great deal (I am all about being informed).
I couldn't live without my music.
I wish I could play an instrument (preferably the piano, or the guitar).
HTML rocks my socks.
Watching movies is my hobby.
Bad English, improper syntax and grammar infuriate me.
I spend entirely too much time on the Internet.
I love to laugh (twisted, sarcastic humor will do the job quite nicely).
Charmed is one of my favorite TV shows (for obvious reasons), along with Gilmore Girls, Law and Order, Crossing Jordan and Nip/Tuck.
Disney rocks (fuck you if you don't agree). I love Fantasia!
I almost never listen to the radio anymore (except for MetalFaction.com).
Corsets and boots...just...OMG.
My baby boy... is the center of my life, My Sun. Hurt him, and I will make you suffer - and rest assured that I will enjoy it.
I
I am both a night person, and a day person (meaning, I love moonlight, and sunshine makes me happy).
My favorite kind of coffee is french roast (I know how to make it from scratch, bi-atch).
Cooking is my passion (I love spicy food!!!).
I enjoy cookies and milk. And apple pie. And cheesecake. And tons of whipped cream...
I am looking for the God to my Goddess...
Intelligent conversation with intelligent men turns me on 
I find Black Hills Gold Jewelry to be exceptionally beautiful.
DarkStarlings IS AN ADDICTION.
I dance, and I sing... though not for any audience (except for my son).
I laugh when people get angry (I can't help it!!).
I do not think I am perfect... but I do know that I will shove some karma down your throat if you try to hurt me
I freak OUT on a regular basis, it is never a wise idea to piss me off.
*****
Results from a quiz:
 I am a Pagan/Occultist
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law. Spending your entire life searching various forms of philosophy and religion, you choose to observe everything and believe little. You're personality is one of truth seeking, nature respecting and god/goddess accepting. Lastly, you don't judge anyone, but if annoyed, you will exact some form of revenge. You don't believe in the Three-Fold Law.
Religion is intensely personal. Quit caring so much about what imbeciles have to say, you'll fare better. - Rose Emmanuella
If you have any questions about what I believe in and what I practice, please, feel free and ask. I don't bite, unless I am provoked. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am not a bad person, I try to avoid conflict as much a s possible. That doesn't go to say that I fear it, though. Conflict is necessary. Still, I do not enjoy it, well, most of the time, I simply do not want to deal with it. I believe in karma! But if there happens to be no way out, I will deal with the situation swiftly and with whatever ways and means available to me. Paraphrase: I don't play fair. So, if you piss me off, I will have no qualms about snapping your miserable, worthless junkie ass in two. You have been warned. Have a nice day and enjoy my page.
\m/
Hometown: Cambridge, Massachusetts & Lathan, Haiti, W.I.
Body Type: 5' 7" / Slim / Slender
Ethnicity: Black / African descent
Religion: Pagan
Astrological Signs: Sun Zodiac: Taurus, Celtic Zodiac: Poplar, Chinese Zodiac: The Swine
Smoke / Drink: Occasionally / Yes
Children: Proud parent (yes, that's right, I have a whelp)
Education: In college
Occupation: Student
Visit my MySpace profile here: 's
Profileand also, remember this: "I cannot be any less than what I am, nor shall I pretend to be more. If you don't like it; well, fuck you."
My personal quote - do consider it before you attempt to contact me.
I found this quote at hell.com, and I liked it enough to put it here: bow down to the strange - be sure to arrange - ready to change|| follow desire - consume like fire - normal is a liar
**** I actually like this, because it happens to be true:
You're a Mystical. You don't fit in in any way and
most people just find you weird, but you are in
a group. You are respected by everyone, even
though you're just really different.
brought to you by
Notice that I do not mention anywhere that I am 'nice'.... remember that.
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Likes |
*spirituality * meditation * magick * belly dancing * reading * music * ancient egyptian lore * clubbing * art * nature * illustration * books * mysticism * tattoos * vampyres * celtic lore * black hills jewelry * mythology * wine * silk * satin * sabbats * esbats * palm reading * tall men, muscular men, men with facial hair, men with long hair ( oh my...) * western astrology * apple pie and cheesecake * eastern astrology * numerology * tarot * nature * yoga* sex * and more sex * psychology * corsets * boots * philosophy * healing * affectionate people * sociology * intimate conversation * religious studies * photomanipulation * latin dancing * culture * travel * tantric sex * lycans * photography * the sidhe * cooking * friendships * elves * *the unconventional*I LOVE CATS.... ....Kittie Kittie Kittie! This was just too cute... Signs (for me, by people who like me)...
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Dislikes |
*looks at the current world's population* You must have a lot of frustration then.
What pisses you off?
Created by ptocheia
"What most people fail to realize is that copulation is basically a vehicle for procreation." - Rose Emmauella
I dislike a lot of things. You know what I dislike even more? Actually taking the time to list them. If I don't like something about you, trust that I will let you know, most assuredly.
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Favorite Music |
I have a very peculiar taste in music, and for this reason I do not bother with genres, they serve only to confuse me. But here are a few bands and artists I appreciate: CHEVELLE, some Metallica (you have a problem with that? Fuck you, maggot), American Head Charge (R.I.P, Bryan Ottoson...), Placebo, Bush, Serpent Underground, Nirvana, Korn, Nightwish, Orgy, razorsuN, Coldplay, Bach, Black Label Society, The Offspring, Mudvayne, Alannis Morrisette, Interpol, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Beethoven, Common, Modest Mouse, Society 1, Starlit, Queens of the Stone Age, Lacuna Coil, Snow Patrol, Melissa Auf Der Maur, The Offspring, No Doubt, Foo Fighters, Tori Amos, A Perfect Circle, Erykah Badu, \m/SLIPKNOT\m/, Mozart, Etienne Daho, Sum 41,Tool, Pearl Jam, Fiona Apple, Stone Temple Pilots, Jill Scott, Chopin, Taking Back Sunday, My Chemical Romance, Bob Marley, Fisher, Smashing Pumpkins, Gypsy Kings, Deftones, there's more....
My song box!
Queens of the Stone Age - Sky Is Fallin'
The sky is falling, human race that we run
has left me crawling, staring straight at the sun
Oh, in a moment I notice, every dog has his day
I paid attention - cost me so much today
For so long... I saw only wrong
But now to remind, it's a waste of time
Close your eyes and see the skies are falling
Close your eyes and see the skies are falling
I wanted something, nothing blank I don't know
it's our deflecting, stones are easy to throw
Oh, in a moment I notice - hours, days left behind
Of wasted, useless, selfless - none of a kind
For so long, I saw only wrong
But now to remind, not to go back to the low
That has drained my life so low
That has drained my life so low
That has drained my life so low
That has drained my...
Close your eyes and see the skies are falling
Close your eyes and see the skies are falling
Close your eyes and see the skies are falling
This is one of my favorite Slipknot songs... because it's about dominance, possession and finally, surrender...
Slipknot - Prosthetics Even if you run, I will find you
I decided I wanted you, now I know, I need...
If you can't be bought, tougher than I thought
Keep in mind, I'm with you
Never left out fate, can't concentrate
Even if... you... run...
YOU WILL BE MINE!
Ah fucking you will be mine!
Ah fucking you will be... MINE!
Ah fucking you will be mine!
Well I found you!
Hanging out of an open window, you laughed, all fingers clenched
Too perfect, far too careless
I couldn't help myself, I just took you!
Damnit, man I knew it was a mistake
Damnit, man I knew it was a mistake
Damnit, man I knew it was a mistake
Damnit, man I knew it was a mistake
(you brought it outta me) MISTAKE
(you brought it outta me) MISTAKE
(you brought it outta me) MISTAKE
(you brought it outta me) MISTAKE
Better make yourself at home, you're here to stay
You won't bother me - if you let me bother you...
All the doors are locked, all the windows shut
Keep in mind, I watch you...
Never leave my side, never leave me, fucker
Even if... you... RUN!
What the fuck is different, I can't believe I'm doing this?
What the fuck is different, I can't believe I'm doing this?
What the fuck is different, I can't believe I'm doing this?
What the fuck is different, I can't believe I'm doing this?
WHAT THE FUCK IS DIFFERENT, I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M DOING THIS?!
WHAT THE FUCK IS DIFFERENT, I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M DOING THIS?!
WHAT THE FUCK IS DIFFERENT, I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M DOING THIS?!
WHAT THE FUCK IS DIFFERENT, I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M DOING THIS?!
Man, I knew it was a mistake
Damnit, man I knew it was a mistake
Damnit, man I knew it was a mistake
Damnit, man I knew it was a MISTAKE!...
(you brought it outta me) MISTAKE!
(you brought it outta me) MISTAKE!
(you brought it outta me) MISTAKE!
(you brought it outta me) MISTAKE...!
(wicked, wicked, wicked, wicked...)
This song is excellent to daydream by...
Tori Amos - Lust
Hey you... gender nectar
sifting through the grain of gold
dripping at your door...
Is that you?
Alpha in her blood
and when the woman lies
You don't believe her...
Rolling and unrolling
coiling, emerging
Running free...
running through the underworld
And into your room
Is he real? Or a ghost-lie?
she feels she isn't heard...
and the veil tears and rages,
till her voices are remembered
And his secrets can be told...
(remember, remember, remember, remember, remember)
Hey you... gender nectar
crystalline from the vine
You know you'll drink her...
Rolling and unrolling
coiling, emerging
Running free...
running through the afterworld
Into your room
So she prays
for a prankster
and lust in the marriage bed...
And he waits till she can give
and he waits... and he waits...
Chevelle...
Chevelle - Don't Fake This
Ignoring a loss of sight
afraid to blink, I might lose the sun.
But don't make this out
to be more than it isn't...
Behind every lie
there's a burden within.
Yes, you're my son.
This suffering...
that's kept within.
Disposable men... lost.
Inside, he was negative
this place, once more was underground.
So look... and connect...
we're refusing to rust.
Healing has to begin, in the past.
So don't fake this
Don't fake this
Don't fake this
Don't...
This suffering...
that's kept within.
Disposable men... lost.
Don't fake this
Don't fake this
Don't fake this
Don't...
Fake... fake... fake...
This suffering....
That's kept within.
Disposable men... lost.
So don't fake this
Don't fake this
Don't fake this
Don't...
Fake... fake... fake... Original KoRn, one of my faves.
Korn - Need to
I, I am confused,
fighting myself
Wanting to give in,
needing your help
Skin cold with fear,
feel it when we touch
Outside, I know you,
but inside I'm fucked...
Can you see it in me?
Skin cold from touch
Each day confronted with what I have done
You pull me closer,
I push you away
You tell me it's okay,
I can't help but feel the pain...
I hate you!
(why are you taken?)
I love you!
(I feel so helpless)
Why is it you?!
ripping my insides each time I'm there with you
Why do I cry?
Why do I... really need to?
Why...?
Why...?
Why...?
Why!?
Fuck you, bitch!
Need to, need to, need to...
Fuck... fuck... fuck... fuck..
I hate you!
(why are you taken?)
I love you!
(I feel so helpless)
Why is it you?!
ripping my insides each time I'm there with you
Why do I try?
Why do I... fucking need to!?
Fuck... fuck... fuck... fuck... fuck... fuck... fuck...
Slut... My personal anthem
A Perfect Circle - Rose
Don't disturb the beast
The tempermental goat
The snail, while he's feeding on
the Rose
Stay, frozen - compromising
What... I... will, I am
Bend around, the wind
silently thrown about
Again I'm treading so... soft, and
Lightly
Compromising... my... will, I am
I am... I will
So no longer will I
Lay down, play dead
Play your doe
In the headlights
locked down and terrified
Your deer - in the headlights
shot down and horrified
When push - comes to pull - comes to shove
Comes to step around this self-destructive dance
that never would've ended 'til I
Rose...
and I... roared aloud here
I will...
I am.
I am, and I will
So no longer
Will I lay down, play dead
Play this... kneel down... gun-shy
Martyr, pitiful
And I rose, and I roared
I will...
I am This song touches me, and I haven't found the words to explain how yet.
Shinedown - Burning Bright
I feel like there is no need for
conversation...
Some questions are better left
without a reason...
And I would rather reveal myself than my
situation...
Now and then I consider... my hesitation
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes...
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning...
Burning bright
I wonder if the things I did were just
to be different...
To spare myself of the constant shame of
my existence...
And I would surely redeem myself in my
desperation...
Here and now I'll express... my situation
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning bright
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes...
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning...
There's nothing ever wrong...
but nothing's ever right?
Such a cruel contradiction
I know I cross the line
it's not easy to define...
I'm born to indecision
There's always something new...
some path I'm supposed to choose
With no particular rhyme or reason
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning bright
I pretend the more...
The more the light shines through me
I pretend to close my eyes
The more the dark consumes me
I pretend I'm burning...
I feel like there is no need for... conversation...
This song helped me a great deal during a very difficult period of my life.
Taproot - Mine
When I look into your eyes, you help me realign...
and show me just how to be myself inside
I�m in control of everything
it�s taking time but that�s ok
I can bring you to my side...
You're my blessing in disguise
You�re mine... (You�re mine!)
You�re mine... (You�re... mine!)
You�re my blessing in disguise
You make me realize
just how and where I want to be
Years from now
When my focal point is set
on something I know I'll get
It�s not a question of how but more of when
You're a hot commodity
the choice is mine and mine for keeps
I can bring you to my side...
You're my blessing in disguise
You�re mine... (You�re mine!)
You�re mine... (You�re... mine!)
You�re my blessing in disguise
You make me realize
just how and where I want to be
Years from now
When I look into your eyes, you help me realign
and show me just where my dedication lies
I�m in control of everything
It�s taking time but that�s ok
I can bring you to my side...
You're my blessing in disguise
You�re mine... (You�re mine!)
You�re mine... (You�re... mine!)
You�re my blessing in disguise
You make me realize
just how and where I want to be
Years from now
You're my blessing in disguise
You�re mine... (You�re mine!)
You�re mine... (You�re... mine!)
You�re my blessing in disguise
You make me realize
just how and where I want to be...
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Favorite Movies |
The Fountain
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Deep Blue Rising, Resident Evil, Resident Evil Apocalypse, Braveheart, The Crow, The Fifth Element, Se7en, The Lord of the Rings (The Fellowship of the Ring, The Two Towers, The Return of the King), Blade (I and II, and III), What Dreams May Come, Frailty, Gladiator, Underworld, Dogma, Ocean's Eleven, The Boondock Saints, What Lies Beneath, Ever After, The Last Samurai, The Craft, A Scanner Darly, Pride and Prejudice, Talladega Nights, Clerks II, Click, The Da Vinci Code, Girl, Interrupted, The Devil Wears Prada, The Brothers Grimm, Crash, Confessions of A Dangerous Mind, Match Point, Blow, The Matrix (I, II, and III), The Exorcist (even though it scares the shit out of me), A Midsummer's Night Dream, The Devil's Advocate, Hero, Bram Stoker's Dracula, Kill Bill Vol. I and II, Dark City, The Crucible, Practical Magic (a very, very good portrayal of paganism and witchcraft), 12 Monkeys, Thirt13n Ghosts (gore galore!) The Harry Potter series, Sweet November, Head in The Clouds, MirrorMask, Zu Warriors, Disney's Fantasia, there's more....(note: I do not like any of the movies made from Anne Rice books, I have read the books and, while the movies pass as excellent "vampire" movies, they are completely inaccurate and fucked up in my opinion. If you are going to do something, don't make a half ass effort, do it right, for fuck's sake.)
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Favorite Books |
Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles and The Lives of the Mayfair Witches, Laurell K. Hamilton's Meredith Gentry series, The Sword of Truth series by Terry Goodkind, J.R.R Tolkien's Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Jacqueline Carrey's Kushiel's Dart Trilogy, yes, I am quite fond of never-ending stories, and three more of my favorite authors are Wilane Schneider Belden, Anne Bishop and Carlos Castanedas, and there is more.... I currently own over 20 books on Magick, Witchcraft and Paganism. My favorite authors on such subjects are: Raymond Buckland, Scott Cunningham, Patricia Telesco, Gerina Dunwich, Raven Grimassi, Edain McCoy, Ly de Angeles and, most recently, Rosemary Clark. I see you looking at me...!size>
HEY YOU! YEA, YOU! READ THIS! If you are not on my friends list, and decide to leave me a message... DO NOT write anything sexually explicit, racially or religiously ingnorant, or boorish and otherwise disrespectful. If I don't know you, I will NOT appreciate the humor. I WON'T think it's cute, funny, witty, snappy, whatever. It will infuriate me beyond comprehension. It's simple: If I am not familiar with you, I won't know what kind of point you're trying to make. So - if that's what you had in mind... DO NOT COMMENT!
Click your ass on outta here, buddy.Also, please use proper English. Let's all pretend we went to elementary school, hmm?face>
Disclaimer: If you choose to leave me a tasteless comment anyway... do not be surprised when my reply turns out quite acidic... When annoyed, I can be quite an asshole.
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