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My whole life is a dark room, one big dark room

 

(Untitled.)
May 22, 09 @ 5:52am
Shibby ness [adjective] --
Smells like teen spirit


St0n3rshibby420 [adjective] --
Banshee-like




current mood: hehe tickled pink when I saw this
current music: manic laughter
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as busy as a Dog on Dope....
May 22, 09 @ 5:09am
So,...


I've just been super busy making tons of drawings and costumes for A-kon 20 comming up next thursday! YAY 6 MORE DAYS!!!!!!


I'm such a nerd.


Anywho's I've done 8 out of 9 drawing I'm entering in the art Auction. I've still gotta get 7 frames for my art and a white school skirt for my Harley Quinn Batman: Arkham Asylum costume.

But other then that I'm bored as hell right now.
I just painted my faye valentine picture tonight, MY PRIDE AND JOY! Which hopefully I can sell for a good $60-$75, but who knows.

I just hope i can get this all done in time for the hanging deadline on thursday. I just hope my eyes did pick more the I could chew...hehe.

So the costumes for A-kon are(DRUM ROLL PLEASE!)

Friday: Rogue and Gambit.

Saturday: Soi Fon and Kenpachi(from Bleach).

&

Of Course

Harley Quinn-Batman:Arkham Asylum and A Zuit Suit wearing Pimped out Joker for the masquerade ball Saturday night and the rest of Kon Sunday.

Also if your readin this, check out my artwork on myspace cuz, I need feedback and suggestion and I'm always open to CONSTRUCTIVE critism.


current mood: tired, wiped out, excited, anxious, and many more...
current music: to much to name..
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It's Been a While - pun intended
Nov 25, 08 @ 4:20am
so i was thinking on how vf and myspace and such sux big balls these days. I remembered DS so i'm back here. Although It's of pointless persiverance that I return. Nonetheless it gives a little to pass the time and catch up on my web skillz.

Since I graduated cosmotology skool I obtained my first job at a halloween store, which was AWESOME! I still haven't taken my cosmotology test tho, sadly the year and 2 months I spent in skool I've sorta come to think of as a waste. Yes, I have a bit of test anxiety about the written, i'm horrible at written tests. But for the money i'v spent to dig myself into the hole i've been living in.I deserve a good like and a nice home. I hate these 4 walls that trap my existance in this room-like prison. I wanna get out but i can't, it sucks....I NEED A JOB!

Well at least i still have my t.v., music, and xbox360 to pass the time......


current mood: ugh something i can express right now
current music: Love Will Tear Us Apart - The Cure
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WTF!!!
Oct 25, 05 @ 3:25am
So my gf, Jaime, won't return my calls or messages.

WHAT THE FUCK?!?

Why do people do this shit to me, just dissapear off the face of the earth and not ask me to come along. They don't tell me if i do something wrong. Does everyone expect me to know everything? Because if they do their fucking crazy! I miss my Jaime, I want to know what i did, I love her. I care about her. We've been together for like 3 months now and now she won't even call me, nothing.

WHAT THE FUCK SHOULD I DO?

I don't want to loose the only thing keeping me alive.

I can't stand this, she's making me crazy. I know that she loves me and I love her. But are these just empty words that she has spoken to me, or does she mean it. The thoughts in my head are telling me otherwise, but my heart might be saying something different. I don't know. Does she even know what she is doing to me? Why won't she do anything. Well...

WHAT THE FUCK CAN I DO?

I'm not much in a relationship, i'v always known that because i'v only had like 3 boyfriends and 2 girlfriends. But if i do something wrong can't she just tell me. I thoguht this relationship would be different...but i was wrong.

WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING WRONG?

I'm sorry, i know i'm not much of a girlfriend, but i tried and that was the best i could do, Jaime. But I don't know if that was good enough for you, if it was you would've called, you would've replied, you would've done something other than nothing, or would you have? I want to make things work between us.

I LOVE YOU, JAIME!

I don't know if i said that enough, but i do, and i mean it. So just tell me the truth Jaime, do you love me still, or have your feelings changed for me? Do you want to try to make thing work or not, i need to know,...

WHAT THE FUCK I SHOULD DO?




...someone, anyone help me out!!!...



current mood: Depressed for the first time in a while.
current music: Seether
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Really...Does it matter what i write here?!?No!!!No ones going to read this!!!
Sep 1, 05 @ 5:11am
broken soul
Your soul is broken.
You are living through a lot of pain everyday
that you have to deal with, which is making you
sorrowful. No one ever stays by your side when
you truly need them and no one ever will.
Everything is hopeless and tragic and you keep
yearning for the day you will be free from
pain. Love is unlikely to happen to you because
you isolate yourself and are suspicious of
peoples motives. You stand in the shadows of
the world, watching what you can never have.
The bruises you carry never seems to heal, your
mind is dark and no one seems to understand or
wants to help. As always, you will be alone in
the world, fighting your dark thoughts by
yourself.


How is your soul? [pics]
brought to you by Quizilla



Hmmm, i really don't wirte that much in online journal unless i'm really bored or venting. So HA!, I made you look at this god forsaking boring page for nothing. but one question?, Are you "down" with the clown? j/k
Dream
"Awake, yet never truly alive, I seek
valuation beyond reality"

Life is unfullfilling for you, and you aren't very
fond of it. What you like is your own
imaginative world, which can be your daydreams,
stories you write or anything similar. You
always prefer that before the actual life. To
people you come off as quite lonesome, and you
may wish you had more friends, but you are more
of a hoper than someone who takes action. That
is how you remain lonely. Or maybe you just
don't find anyone who you can relate to. Inside
you feel empty, like you are missing something
important that you can't quite put a finger on
what it is. Somehow you wish to be swept away
from the normality and led into something
extraordinary. This has yet to happen, and you
keep on feeling dissapointed with the little
that life has to offer. At least you continue
to express yourself through
art/writing/poems/daydreaming.


What is Your Phrase? [for darker people]
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Depressed
Your connection with darkness is through your
depression. Hated, sad and often feeling
lonely, there is only a few that appreciate the
real you. You tend to keep to yourself and away
from the world since you don't want to be hurt
and betrayed again. Music gives you the
understanding you need to get through, it's
your "therapy". Or you express
yourself through art or writing. Chances are
you're also an anti-social person, who only
likes being with close friends, if even that.
The world has finally showed it's true face for
you and you wish life wasn't this miserable to
live through. Maybe you'll find happiness in
the future, but right now you're just hiding
away from the world. Who needs people anyway?


What is your connection with darkness? [pics]
brought to you by Quizilla

src="http://live.quizilla.com/user_images/P/PainfulBliss/1117238538_Power_Fly.JPG">
Your power is: The ability to fly


Explanation: This powers speaks pretty
much for itself. Though you don't need wings
for this power,you can fly anyway. Some people
may consider it as telekinesis since they can
also fly, but you can't make material things
move like they can. This ability could be a
relaxing activity when you want to get away
from everyday troubles. Also it is good when
sneaking upon an enemy since it makes no sound.
When going over to the "dark side"
the power could be used to harrass and break
into building through windows etc.
You are quite similar to this power since you
like to have your head in the clouds.
Supernatural things amuse while ordinary life
does not. If your daydreaming has gotten a
little too far you might be zooned out all the
time, even when you are having a conversation.
Your desires and/or goals tend to be
unrealistic even if you know those would
probably never happen. Travelling is something
you would be interested in doing since seeing
exotic scenery fits with your fantasies of
escaping your plain life. You can also have
some creative ability (writer, playing an
instrumen etc) that interests you.
Negative aspects: The whole reason you
may be escaping life could be fear of being let
down by it. So if that would come to happen,
and an important dream had been crushed you
could get depressed.




What Power is Compatible With You? [beautiful anime pictures + 12 detailed results]
brought to you by Quizilla

Broody
Your word is: Brooding. You are a true thinker and
often try to figure out the meaning of life,
why we are all here etc. You may not be so
social, and often think twice before acting but
those thoughts you have in your mind never stop
flowing in. Sometimes you can be so
concentrated you forget about other things that
you have to do. Don't change, this world needs
deep people.


What Dark Word Represents You? [anime pics]
brought to you by Quizilla

Ooooo the fire tail ^^
You're a poisin/jungle dragon!!!
You love to be one with nature, and tend to keep to
yourseld. But you'd like to get more friends,
even if it means they trick you, and try to
take your treasure. And if you find out about
that, or get made at them, you can spit poisin
at them! It's your choice if they live or die.


What kind of Dragon are YOU?(with pics now!)
brought to you by Quizilla

Reality
Your wise quote is: "Reality bites with a
variety of sizes of teeth"(-Tony Follari)
As a person, you think life is just plain
painful, horrible and everything else you don't
like. Happy people confuse you. Alot. I mean,
why are they so happy anyway? You are depressed
and perhaps utterly alone and live life rather
montone. You feel there is no reason to really
be here and feel helpless.


What wise quote fits you? [pics]
brought to you by Quizilla

Dead soul
Your soul is dead.
You've probably been through one too many rough
times in your life which has eaten you up from
the inside. Now there's nothing more to eat
from since you just don't care anymore. Life is
meaningless and you live it like a zombie. The
good thing though is that you cant be hurt,
since you are so distant from the emotional
world. Love is something you dont understand or
just dont remember. If it was up to you, your
life would already be over, but it doesn't make
you suicidal. You are probably alone most of
the time, looking at the world with a blank
stare. The yearning to feel alive and be happy
has simply gone away. What's left now is only
the shell of what used to be you.


How is your soul? [pics]
brought to you by Quizilla

Bring me to Life
Your Evanescence song is: Bring me to Life
You have been so alone in this world for such a
long time, your emotional level is very low.
You live in the darkness in your life and mind,
and feel helpless about your whole situation.
People rarely understand you or why you act
like you do. But then there is this person in
your life that changes things. He/she
understands you and makes you feel alive again.
He/she is your ray of hope in your otherwise so
dark life.

Now that I know what I'm without
you can't just leave me



What Evanescence song are you?[many outcomes + wonderful pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla
If I only knew who this person was they are talking about.

SystemOfADown
You are "Atwa" by System of a Down. You
were a happy person, thinking you were loved,
when in fact you were the opposite. Now, you
can't find happiness again. Being unloved is
not your thing, and you are now like a zombie,
just walking around without a purpose. A living
dead..


Which of the rock songs that I like are you? (pics)
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god, i love daron malakian, hes sooo sexy!!!!This is my theme song!

Hopeless
Life has no meaning and humans can't be saved.
Although you have an urge to help in someway
you give up before you even try. The reason is
because you think you're a nobdy and therefor
have no meaning to the world and can't help.
All you do is watch life pass you by, becoming
more deppressed each moment.


How do you see life?
brought to you by Quizilla


current mood: mood? The computer has moods?,Oh Yes, Yes, Yes!
current music: Tool-Stinkfist and such
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